If only I had done something different in the past, I'd think. Ah, regret. Not only did I drop the ball, but it landed right on my foot. It hurts, and it hurts real bad. In spite of telling myself that it happened for the best (which also seems like an excuse at this point), I know there is a chance that it didn't and it's hard to ignore that fact. I try everything I can to cheer myself up. Quotes help:
“I have no regrets in my life. I think that everything happens to you for a reason. The hard times that you go through build character, making you a much stronger person.”
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.”
“Forget regret, or life is yours to miss.”
“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
No, that did not help, I still feel terrible!
I try to look at the issue from the different perspective:
Well if I had not missed my said opportunity, I would have definitely missed the other thing that would have come around at the same time and managed to please me a little more.
And that is sure to happen. I hope.
Well part of this problem lies in the unfortunate fact that life is one crazy, 70 year long (depends) game of roulette. But not just one wheel, there's a wheel for every moment you make a decision, which is practically every minute. Gasp!
Now think about this: Go back to when you graduated school and had to pick a college which had a course you wanted so you could graduate and pick the career you wanted . You had so many options but you could only pick one and you know what you chose. But imagine taking a different step. Even if you went to a similiar college that had the same course and was in the same city, your life today would be totally different. You'd have different friends, different opinions, a different lifestyle, perhaps even a different significant other. Your life today would be totally different. If you've seen the movie, 'Butterfly Effect', you'll know what I am talking about. It's called the Chaos Theory and it's scary!
The college example was just one small decision amongst the thousands that we make every single day. If only this, if only that, I'd be at a better place and that's what everyone always thinks. But perhaps, it's really not as bad as you think. Here's a quote that did manage to make me feel better:
“The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be.” - Marcel Pagnol.
Maybe I'll stop right here and look at how losing an opportunity doesn't really matter as long as your head is still above the water and you're still focused on catching the next bus.
There always is a next bus, don't forget that.
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Empathy. Every Word.
ReplyDeleteI think that if a person had taken up the opportunity that they missed, and now regret, they'd clearly be down a different road today, but they'd still be able to regret something else they missed at that point.
Cheerful thought: There's ALWAYS going to be something that you regret in your life.
All one can hope for is that, in the wide array of things that can cause you to feel regret; the ones that apply to you eventually stop hurting, and that the intensity wears down.
i wonder how related this is to the message you sent me :) but that was, the perfect example of 'one door, another' all that jazz....
ReplyDelete@Yasmeen: Well, I've learnt my lesson. Believe me, I have. ;) If nothing else, said missed opportunity actually gave me more reason to believe everything happens for a reason. :)
ReplyDelete@Angad: Yes, very related. :D